Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Shame - the story of my life.
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