So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
