guys are only as good as the porn they watch
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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