Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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