SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Randomize
