I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
