and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
