he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
