her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
