the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
