I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize