is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
The struggles of a small town man whore
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
