she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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