How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Best friends brother. Beat that.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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