I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
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