Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
