You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
