9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
