im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize
