We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
