Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize