I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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