You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
