therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
