There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
