Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
