new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Randomize
