12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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