i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize