Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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