I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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