Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
