Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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