He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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