What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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