If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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