also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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