so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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