So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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