And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
