The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize