based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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