Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
