Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Why is your signature on my underwear?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
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