Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I checked into jail on foursquare
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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