I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize