He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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