No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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