I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
