You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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