i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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