I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
