I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
she woke up with a sticky ear
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
