Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I need a beard to bite.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
